The Lord reminded me (again!) that He is the root of success; without Him, there is none.
It seems every couple of months I lose sight of this and run myself in a laundry-cooking-cleaning-working hamster wheel–with the kids bouncing around in there with me–while my husband stands outside knocking every so often, wondering why I’m panting with fatigue. Finally, I collapse out of the wheel. Dirty clothes and dishes crash on top of me, because–let’s face it–they’ll always exist. After the metaphorical wheezing subsides, the Lord whispers to me.
He is the source of everything. The clothes I fold. The dishes I scrub. The food I cook. The butts I wipe. When I put the to-dos before spending time with Him, I’m putting creation before the Creator.
I’m thankful for my family–I have an amazing husband. And our daughters? Beautiful–inside and out.
I’m thankful for the dishes and laundry and cooking and butt-wiping that comes with the territory. (Not to mention our nearly-3-year-old’s 2 a.m. calls for water or blanket readjustments. I digress.)
I want to take care of them. That’s why I keep stepping in that stupid wheel. And that’s what I’m not thankful for.
Because remorse hurts. Going to the Lord–for approximately the 8,169th time since starting motherhood three years ago–and telling Him “I’m sorry,” hurts. Partially because the thought runs through my mind: Why is the Lord forgiving me again?
It is for His holy name’s sake that He continues forgiving and blessing us. (Ezekiel 36:22)
Because He loves us. (John 3:16)
Because He is God, and God is love. (1 John 4:8b)